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To argue or not to argue?

Nowadays I rarely argue. Why?

Arguing at work doesn’t lead anywhere

Exchanging ideas in a constructive way does help at work. Arguing doesn’t. There’s a fine line between exchanging ideas and blocking progress because co-workers can’t reach an agreement. Negotiation is always better because it leads to solutions.

Arguing to change other people doesn’t work either

People experiment with life, with their feelings and consequences of their actions. We learn from our mistakes so that we can grow. If someone is convinced they need to get a certain experience (which I know will be negative), perhaps they just need that experience. So what's the point of taking away their opportunity to grow?

I don’t feel threatened by other people’s views

Even if someone thinks that earth is flat, why would I care? Earth isn’t going to become flat right? And my life won’t collapse. If people choose to have this kind of views, it’s their choice, their responsibility.

Arguing creates the wrong kind of experience

I either win and have to face the consequences of dealing with an angry disappointed opponent. Or I lose and feel bad about the situation and....become angry and disappointed. Either way it's wasted time, energy and opportunity to build something positive and constructive in this life. Instead I’d rather walk at the beach or chat with a friend.

Arguing is a point in time activity

Our personal views change over time, and humanity’s knowledge about the universe changes over time. Arguments will therefore change. What today seems like the perfect reason for an argument, will look ridiculous tomorrow. Why are we dying to argue about something that will change tomorrow anyway?


Instead of arguing why not learn to exchange views in a constructive way and choose best aspects in each person’s views? Why not work together towards a common goal?

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