Many of us fear life, although not many of us are ready to acknowledge it. Well, this world doesn't look like a particularly friendly and easy-to-live place, at least big parts of this world, just ask the TV news.
I think though our fear of life goes beyond the negative TV news. It's deeper. It's ingrained in us. We're raised with it, at least most of us. Perhaps some of us are already born with it. We're fed it by our parents. Then school and social institutions reinforce it. Then the TV news comes in.
By then the fear is already deeply anchored in us, it's part of us and we barely notice it, we're so used to it. Creativity seems hard, new opportunities seem unsafe, our mindsets are all over negative and changing the rules seems impossible. If asked, our brains happily (or rather unhappily) give 100+ logical reasons why life is hard, unsafe and unfriendly. All these reasons to fear life can be summed up with these three main fears:
Life is uncontrollable. We can't control weather, nature, events, other people. Well, we try hard - do I really need to list here all the numerous ways humankind has been trying to control mother nature and each other over the centuries? But we can't. We can't even manage our own mindsets and emotions.
Life is unpredictable. Good things happen, yes. To some of us - many times or sometimes. Not so often to others. But shit happens, too. To many of us. And to some - more often than to others. Why? Who knows. And yes, I read a lot about karma and many other interesting things. But that didn't help me - in practical terms - to live a predictably happy and safe life right here right now.
Life is unpurposeful. Or at least it seems so to many people. Neither science nor religion, let alone our every day life, are able to explain in simple terms the purpose of our lives right here right now. We debate, argue and clash with different viewpoints to no avail. In the meantime, our kids grow without purpose and all they can see is the world that is difficult to predict and impossible to control.
This indeed paints a very bleak picture. But I'd argue that things aren't as bad in reality.
Below are my three reasons to stop fearing life:
1. We can't control life but we can shape it
We're responsible for our own life and we can change it by reshaping our personality and mindset. We can change the way we think about the world and how we relate to other people. We start with changing our own life and this has an effect on those around us, and then on the world around us. The more we grow the bigger the circles on the water.
2. We can't predict life but we can go with the flow
This is about accepting that shit happens, not stressing about it and learning from it. This is also about growing our mindset to a point where we're more balanced and react less and less to the negative things. As we overcome our insecurities and grow our balanced attitude to life, we shift our focus to more constructive and creative ideas. We start trusting ourselves (and therefore life) more and more and see more positivity around us.
3. We may not know the true purpose of life but we can come up with one
How about using life to become better humans and change the world to be a better place? This sounds like a valid purpose worth living for. If we look around, it's the more brave, resilient, creative, constructive and collaborative of us who are making the positive changes in this world.
So, working on our personality and our mindset doesn't seem such a bad idea, and it has many benefits, too, such as having calmer and more positive lives and better relationships with people.